About Me

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Bhubaneswar, Orissa, India
My life as I lived it had often seemed to me like a story that has no beginning and no end. I had the feeling that I was a historical fragment,an excerpt for which the preceding and the succeeding text was missing. I could well imagine that I might have lived in former centuries and therefore encountered questions I was not able to answer; that I had to be born again because I had not fulfilled the task that was given to me. Finding myself to exist in this world, I believe I shall in some shape or other always exist; and with all inconveniences human life is liable to, I shall not object to a new edition of mine, hoping , however, that the "errata" of the last may be corrected. I am certain that I have been here as I am now, a thousand times before, and I hope to return a thousand times.

Friday, February 25, 2011


I sail to you in the ocean of my dreams... To a far away distant place Of great beauty and tranquility... Where pain and suffering do not exist, Where we give praise for our joy and happiness, Where our love intertwines with a love for all things. O! beloved keeper of my heart The companion of my soul You have reached out and touched the essence of my being And shown me the way to a higher plane. Your love has awakened me from my years of slumber. A beckoning call to the spiritual world Where my body is mist in the mountains... This is where my heart belongs... This is where my soul lives…

For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul !!

I love you Chitralekha Nath !!

Tuesday, January 11, 2011


Trying to forget someone you love is like trying to remember someone you never met.
True love never dies as we see in our eyes, only when we let go that we can truly say goodbye.
Real loss only occurs when you lose something that you love more than yourself.
I thought I loved her, but she had to break my heart for me to know what true love really is.
The bad things in life open your eyes to the good things you weren't paying attention to before.
Time goes by, life goes on, and all I can think of is why you're gone.
A break up is like a broken mirror. It is better to leave it broken than hurt yourself trying to fix it.
Memories are the best souvenirs.
I should have been more careful. I was blinded by your halo, so I never noticed the horns.
If I could have one lifetime wish, one wish that would come true, I'd pray to God with all my heart, for yesterday...and you!
It's a horrible thing to see your lost love walk past you with another guy, and it's the worst thing to know that you made a mistake in letting her go.
I can't escape the thought of you. Even in my dreams you are there. It's not fair how you're gone, and how you're moving on so fast, while I am still living in the past.

Don't ever give up if you still want to try, don't ever wipe your tears if you still want to cry. Don't ever settle for an answer if you still want to know. Don't ever say you don't love her if you can't let her go.
How can I forget you when you're always on my mind? How can I not want you when your all I want inside? How can I let you go when I can't see us apart? How can I not love you when you control my heart?
Learn to love someone who would never make you cry. If she hurts you real bad, then why don't you just say goodbye. You see, women are not worthy of precious tears, they just make us look terrible so please remember that my dear.
I thought that by telling myself and everyone else that I hated you. That sooner or later I would come to believe it.
But I now realize that by lying, it makes me want you even more.
Parting of loving someone is learning to let go.
A failing love is like desperately hanging on to something precious; not wanting to give up, but your hands feel the pain. And, when you finally let go, you're free from any pain, but your hands are empty.
When speaking of lost love, time may heal all wounds, but there will always be scars.
Breaking up is not a stupid thing; instead it makes you a better person and realize your mistakes.
No matter how much it'll hurt me to see you, my most loved lost one, all that I wish is look into your eyes once again.
I'm not saying there wasn't anything wrong, I just didn't think you'd ever get tired of me. I'm not saying we ever had the right to hold on, I just didn't wanna let it get away from me.
Letting go of someone dear to you is hard, but holding on to someone who doesn't even feel the same is much harder. Giving up doesn't mean you are weak! It only means that you are strong enough to let go!
What do you live for when all you were living for is gone?
A distant cry is love lost, but the sound of laughter is one that'll last forever, whatever that may be.
Losing you is like losing my heart.
Take a look at what you have. Think of all you did to get it. Remember it only takes one second to lose.

Loving you was easy, losing you was hard. Loving you is still easy, but knowing you are no longer mine, is the hardest of it all.
They say no matter how dark the night is, the sun always rises again ... I say lost love makes one realize that no matter how bright the day is, the sun will always set again.
Once you find someone you really love try your hardest not to lose them, because you will never get over the feeling of loneliness.
A lost love is never lost unless what's lost is the love for your lover.
If you could choose between life and death you would almost rather die, love is fun but hurts so much the price you pay is high. And so I say don't fall in love, you will get hurt before your through. You see my friend, I ought to know, I fell in love with you.
One day you'll love me, the way I loved you. One day you'll think of me the way I thought of you. One day you'll cry for me, the way I cried for you. One day you'll want me, but I won't want you.
Even if she doesn't like me tomorrow, I knew she loved me yesterday.
You said you didn't want to see me get hurt, so does that mean you closed your eyes when I cried?
I thought I'd forget you, but I guess I forgot to.
Don't say we're not right for each other, the way I see it, we're not meant for anyone else.
Loving you was easy, losing you was hard. Loving you is still easy, but knowing you are no longer mine, is the hardest of it all.

You left me suddenly, but I know some day you and I will once again be together.
I cry because I know she doesn't feel the way I do. I cry because I think of how pathetic I am, and I cry because I think I'll be crying forever.
Sometimes we tend to be in despair when the person we love leaves us, but the truth is, it's not our loss, but theirs, for they left the only person who wouldn't give up on them.
The biggest mistake in my life that I have ever done was to let you go. And, now I realize that you will never come back to me.
Some people say the worst way to miss someone is when they are right next to you and you know you can't have them, but it's worse when you thought you didn't want them anymore and then all of a sudden you realize you can't live without them
There are reasons we met, reasons for the good and the bad times, and more importantly, a reason to an end. We have more to learn, more to experience, and more loving left in this lifetime.
The worst thing is holding on to someone who doesn't want to be held on to.
I can't believe she's gone, I thought love would last but I was wrong.
Days continue to pass, stars continue to shine. Why do I have tears in my eyes today when she was NEVER mine?
A million words wouldn't bring you back. I know because I've tried. Neither would a million tears. I know because I've cried!
There's only one thing I regret doing, loving the girl who didn't love me, and forgetting the one who did.
It's hard to tell your mind to stop loving someone, when you're heart still does.
Love is letting go of the one you love, hoping that they will come back to you when they realize what they have lost.
The time runs slowly...just like my tears.
Should I hate you because you hurt me? Or should I love you because you made me feel special?
It is now one of my biggest regrets in this life: not to have seen the extent of your love for me.
I will never regret loving you, only believing you loved me too.
If your love does not work with that person, it just means that someone else loves you more.
When you have loved unconditionally one girl and lost that love, it leaves a wound that never heals, a sad and broken heart, a void forever.
We cannot beg someone to stay if they want to leave and be with someone else. We have to admit that love doesn't give us the license to own a person. This is what love means...sacrifice.
If the truth was told instead of a lie, then the pain would go away sooner and not hurt as much.
It really hurts when you expected so much more from the person you once loved so much.
If you can't save the relationship, at least save your pride.
Falling in love is awfully simple, but falling out of love is simply awful.
The saddest thing in life is loving someone who used to love you.
No one realizes the beauty of love, until you lose it.
Why do we wait until it is too late? Why do we let someone else have what we were too scared to reach out and take?
The most painful thing is to be sitting right next to the person you love most, but never being able to let them know.
Deep down you knows it's best for yourself, but you hate the thought of her being with someone else.
Sometimes I wish I had never met you because then I could go to bed at night not knowing there was someone like you out there.
I wish I was a kid again, because skinned knees are easier to fix than broken hearts.
When I go away please listen, for the wind will bring you my words of goodbye.
People say that love doesn't cost, but then again, why do so many people pay for it?
Why do things have to pass you by? The things that are so irreplaceable, they seem to run by without giving us the chance to see how much we've just lost.
If I can't have you, at least i was able to know I had you.
The one who makes me the happiest, is always the one who is already taken.
A heart breaking isn't always as loud as a bomb exploding.. Sometimes it can be as quiet as a feather falling.. And the most painful thing is, no one really hears it, except you..
I wish you could look at me and see the person you once loved instead of the person you have grown to hate.
Sailing across the seas, a fisherman asks me, 'What the sand scattered for miles made up of?' 'Dead end O! The broken hearts of a million lovers on the earth .. all scattered ...... all scattered......'.
Someday you'll know, that I was the one for you.
Don't make my mistake. Don't let yourself be so angry that you stop loving. Because one day you'll wake up from that anger, and the person you love will be gone.
I close my eyes just to try and see you smile one more time, but it's been so long all I do is cry. Can't we find some love to take this away? 'cause pain gets stronger everyday.
Now I believe it when people say love is blind... 'cause i have been blind to love a person like you.
How can I promise you forever when tomorrow is so far away from me? How can I dry your tears when I have a bleeding heart inside of me? how can I ever forget you when your name is etched so deep within me?
Maybe if I had just looked away that first night you came towards me, everything would be different and my heart wouldn't be breaking right now.
Love... Why does it hurt? Why does it ache? Maybe because we love too much and too deep that sometimes we forget to keep a little for ourselves...sad but true.
Oftentimes we say goodbye to the person we love without wanting to. Though that mean that we've stopped loving them or we've stopped to care. Sometimes goodbye is a painful way to say I love you.
If the human body can live with food and water, then why does it feel like I can't live without you?
If someone you love breaks your heart, cry a river, build a bridge, and get over it.
Don't make my mistake. Don't let yourself be so angry that you stop loving. Because one day you'll wake up from that anger, and the person you love will be gone.

God bless n Allah hafiz,

Tuesday, January 4, 2011


It is ironical that somehow all famous lovers never ever got a chance to live happily ever after. Yet, their names are etched in golden letters in the history of mankind. These famous love stories are a living proof that love is immortal. Though lovers die, love remains forever and does not let their sacrifices go waste. These popular love affairs are an inspiration to many around the world.Most youngsters smitten by love often become synonymous to these famous lovers. People give them names like Romeo-Juliet that proves that these famous lovers are a big inspiration for falling in love, never mind the consequences.
It is said that love conquers all. These young people gave their lives without thinking twice.They just wanted to live happily ever after. However, it is not that easy and we all know fairy tales rarely come true. The trials and tribulations that these young lovers braved, just to be with each other, is enough to send shivers down the spine. They were happy to die together too. They were of the belief that since they could not live together, atleast in death they should not be separated. Some of the famous love stories are those of Anthony-Cleopatra, Pyramus-Thisbe, Salim-Anarkali, and Laila-Majnu. Their great love sagas are an inspiration to fall in love and not to be afraid of giving even the biggest of all sacrifices. Though these great people are not alive, they shall always remain immortal in the hearts of all those who are in 'LOVE'...!!

Yours forever n ever n ever......,
Allah hafiz and God bless,

Friday, October 1, 2010


Maddening, swirling, tumultuous thoughts give my heart no peace

Muscles tensing, heart's wrenching, longing for release

Walled off from emotions, numbed to dreams of bliss

Frantically grasping for a hold, sliding further into the abyss

All color drains from my world, subtle shades of gray permeate

Broken shards cast illusions, hope falsely propagates

A former warrior, battle tested, I frantically disguise my fears

Resolve dissolves, nervousness abounds as my refuge disappears

As rain cycle nears an end, the winter begins to advance

Stealthily attacking, patiently awaiting for a perfect chance

A frozen heart, desolate and bare, obscures all that would try to see

The warmth reflected, gives off no heat, illusions mask reality

On hands and knees, mumbling pleas, I search for sanctuary

To glimpse beyond this desolation, to a world of possibility

Eyes closed, perceptions peeked, it hovers beyond my reach

A whispered supplication, alone, these barriers I cannot breach

A gentle touch, delicate and warm, I feel her reach for me

Chasing back the shadows, an angel, cradles my sanity

Relaxing, drifting, smiling, I find comfort in her embrace

My savior and redeemer, a sassy smile upon her face

I close my eyes and search within, I'll trust my instincts this time

I feel a heart of gold as her passion's unfold, a beauty so sublime

Peace radiates from her body, a warmth soaks into my soul

A smile reflects a love so deep, my heart I cannot control

Illusions shimmer and are gone, my world is bright and true

Spring marches forth with determination as my life begins anew

To pass beyond is what I sought, but dreams do not compare

To the reality of this wonderland graced by an angel so fair

Dreams shared, rendezvous dared, we joined together as one

The bonds of my enslavement have been lifted, my battle finally won

No regrets can be found, my reflections bring no remorse

Love that binds, as the tendrils climbed lead me down this course

Peace and comfort fill my soul where once only chaos dared

Now love emanates, peace radiates, because an angel cared

Tuesday, September 21, 2010


No matter how long you may live, you’ll never stop learning. Every minute of every day brings new opportunities to learn something we’ve never known before. As long as we’re open to receive, God will continue to teach us every day.

I’m still learning, and I know I always will be. What God teaches me every day about love continues to change my life. I’ve come to the place where I can honestly say, “Lord, eliminate everything in my life that’s holding me back. Please take away anything that’s keeping me from walking in love and finding true fulfillment in my life.” In other words, “Lord, reduce me to love—bring me to a state or condition of walking in love completely!”

One of the most important facets I’ve learned about love is unselfishness, which is characterized in the Holy Bible as a willingness to sacrifice one’s own wishes for those of others. I’ve learned that true love will always adapt and adjust to the needs and desires of other people.

It’s impossible for people who’ve truly been reduced to love to be selfish. God has taught them how to be totally adaptable and adjustable to others. Selfish people, on the other hand, have hard hearts. It’s very difficult for them to learn anything—especially if it involves self-sacrifice. They expect everyone else to adjust to them and their needs. They simply don’t know how to adjust to others without becoming angry or upset.

Learning to adapt and adjust to the needs and desires of others was very difficult for me. To be honest, I wanted my way, and I got upset when I didn’t get it. I was selfish! I wanted what I wanted, when I wanted it! I couldn’t stand having to wait on someone else or bending my own wishes to accommodate someone else’s timetable.

But God began to soften my heart, and gradually I learned to see the needs of others. Then God gave me compassion—the heartfelt desire to meet the needs of others first before my own.

Slowly, I became committed to walking in love. I learned to adapt my own needs and desires in order to help meet the needs of others. I learned how to show love in different ways to different people. Not all people need the same thing from us. One of our dear ones, for example, may need more of our personal time than the others. One of our friends may need more encouragement on a regular basis than another.

For example, all of my family members need me, my parents need me, my friends need me—and they all need me in different ways.

Do I ever feel too needed? Of course! We all feel overwhelmed from time to time. But I remind myself that God gives me grace for whatever He places in my life.

If I ever get weary of always trying to be available to meet the needs of others, I remind myself of all the years I lived in selfishness and how unhappy I was. Now I’m just making up for lost time! When I think on this, it doesn’t take long for me to adjust my attitude. After all, just telling people “I love you” is not enough. We need to go beyond the words and actually do something to help meet their needs.

I never acknowledged the many ways in which Ranu adjusted to my needs. I never saw what she did do—only what she didn’t—and it was ruining our relationship. I’m glad that I’ve learned to adapt and adjust.

Once you’ve been reduced to love, you’ll have no trouble establishing and maintaining good, healthy relationships with others. Your primary goal in life will be to put the wishes of others before your own. You’ll learn that true love is all about sacrifice and selfishness will be a thing of the past.

Friday, July 16, 2010


Emotional pain can become an addiction. A negative feeling, such as anger, worry, grief, fear, or depression, can become so habitual that you cannot live without it.

When a person is continuously stressed by emotional pain, there are subtle changes in the body that create a dependency on stress-related chemistry. Changing habitual patterns of pain can be as difficult as giving up an addictive substance, such as nicotine, alcohol, or even heroin.
The emotional pain addict unconsciously seeks out situations that are sure to result in pain. A history of prolonged, negative, stressful relationships is usually symptomatic of emotional pain addiction. The feelings of love and pain are so frequently associated that they become one and the same. Loving unavailable people and staying in intolerable relationships, for example, are signs that love and pain have become intertwined. There are many such pain-linked feelings in the repertoire of pain addiction.

Ever wonder why you feel pain in your chest when your feelings have been hurt? Terms like “heartache” and “gut wrenching” are not just metaphors — they describe both physical and emotional pain.

What are emotions? Emotions are energy that we feel in our bodies as physical sensations. We may feel the energy of anger an tightness in our chest or jaw. We may feel the energy of fear as tension in our stomach or jitteriness in our whole body. We may feel the energy of love as a fullness in our heart and the energy of peace as a full quiet feeling in our gut. Each of us feels our emotions differently, and each of us has learned to put names to the various physical sensations that are caused by the energy of our emotional state.

When I tell people that they need to be willing to feel their emotional pain, they often say to me, "What's the big deal about that? I feel my pain all the time." But there is a world of difference between feeling pain and having the willingness to feel it in order to learn from it. Willingness includes the capacity to stay with the painful emotion, explore it, own it. There is no healing in just feeling and expressing your emotional pain. You can cry and rage forever, but if you are not willing to take responsibility for your pain, you will be stuck with it forever.

Sometimes people respond with, "Why? Why feel my pain? What's the point?" They believe that feeling emotional pain—especially the pain of loss—is a waste of time. "Why cry over spilled milk?" they argue. "Why can't we just try to find our joy and skip the pain?" The answer is: because joy and pain are in the same box. When you put a lid on your pain and stuff it back inside, you put a lid on your joy. You choose to live an emotionally stunted life. You also close your ears to the information that pain brings you.

Pain is how your Inner Child lets you know that you are behaving in ways that are not in your highest good. Emotional pain tells you to stop doing the thing that is causing you pain. If you do not pay attention to your emotional pain, you will go on thinking and acting in ways that cause you pain.

Do I have to give myself up, to be loved by God? May be Yes...

God bless n Allah hafiz,


Thursday, June 10, 2010


LOVE is not a feeling. Love is an action. Love is a choice.
True Love is the action to choose unconditionally in the process of offering to another human being the qualities of:
Affection, Care, Concern, Respect, Thoughtfulness, Forgiveness, Compassion, Trust, Joy and many other positive emotional expressions of value and worth toward ANY living being as being Loveable and valuable.

Love is just love. Love is not trading of emotions, it cant be compared to a savings bank account where u deposit emotions n withdraw care. Love is pure , its impulsive , its unbreakable , it cant be compared to a broken string because love cannot be broken it can only be paused for a while.

When you see each other and have a smile on your face, when your loved one makes a mistake and you can't get angry on him even when you try hard. When you think of spending every possible time with your loved one.
This is true love

"True love" can and will differ from person to person based on emotional maturity. To know true love you not only must love in such a way that you would give your own life at the drop of a hat to save him/her. If you get married to someone, and fifteen years later, you can still look them in the eye and feel the same you did on your first date, then it's true love. Like the below quote; a good way to know true love is to base it on how you feel for the last person you love romantically in your life.

I get choked up telling her how much I care about her.
- I feel pain every time she hurts.
- every couple I see reminds me of her.
- everything I want to do I want to do with her.
- I have a craving for something I crave it with with her.
- it still excites me when she calls.
- telling each other we love each other means more each time.
- I know that I love her more now than I did yesterday.
- I can be my absolute self with her and she can do the same.
- her beauty in my eyes never fades.
- we can disagree and still compromise with each other.

True love: is hard to find and painful to lose,
-can be the best thing that happens to you or the worst,
- can drive you crazy or keep you sane,
-can destroy lives or save them,
-can stop wars or start them,
-can clarify or confuse,
-pushes and pulls people away,
-obvious and subliminal, is impossible to define

-When one is aware of shortcomings of the partner and yet accepts.
-When the ego does not come in between in differences and one would rather clear the air, or apologise and patch up, than break-up.
-When one 'desires' the partner in his/her life.
-When you 'chose' to be with him/ her inspite of other options - not bec there are no options !
When you give each other space and respect individuality.
-When you enjoy togetherness - talking or even silence - and tender touching.
-When you cant even think of hurting or insult the partners feeling.
-You never wish him/ her ill and would never harm in any way.
This is true love.

Like true love the topic is also 'endless'.

The love that brings a woman a man together is known as the third level of love. This level is among the strongest of them all.This kind of love has brought together families that have argued for years and years, such as in the Shakespearean play, Romeo and Juliet. Even though the two mentioned made a big mistake in the end, it still brought their families together.

The phrase, love makes the world go round is very true. It's is our driving force, is gives us the necessary power to survive in this world that for many has no meaning for what ever reason it may be. Poems, plays, and legends can only briefly touch the true meaning of love. We can only feel what that meaning is, and express it in ways only we can understand towards another. Its the "language of the world" which makes it possible for the women and men to bond together in a relationship, or marriage. The language of the world is know by everybody no matter what part of the world they are coming from. If you look a woman in the eye and she looks back at you in that special way that cant be explained there is no need for words. No need for translation. Love does not need words to be explained. The true question we should be asking is not, what is life, but what is love?

-Love is patient,
- love is kind.
-Love does not envy,
-Love does not boast,
-Love is not proud.
-Love is not rude,
-Love is not self-seeking,
-Love is not easily angered,
-Love keeps no record of wrongs.
-Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
-Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

This is true love....it never comes to an end...True love is being with each other always and forever till the end of days

God bless and allah hafiz,